I haven’t done the best job of keeping regular blog updates on how the training plan is going for the Abersoch race. If I am completely honest, I probably haven’t done the best job of sticking to the letter of the plan either – sorry, Jack! That said, I have trained, I have done some work I don’t usually do and I am looking forward to exploring a new route so why do you suppose there were tears on this evening’s run?!
I was so looking forward to a plod with my club buddies and knew beforehand that Claire would be up for a short 4-5km session so I was set. It’s half term, however, I spent the day in school rehearsing so was feeling a tad tired going in to the session but still, I usually do an entire day at school and then run so no excuse there! A big gang of us set off together on the understanding that we were going for a gentle run especially as Caryl had come for a post-Liverpool marathon recovery run. We all set off and we’re chatting away about future runs; it was a nice pace and a new route for me but part way through I became increasingly aware that I was fighting tears back and the annoying gremlin of self doubt was rearing its ugly head. Seriously?! I didn’t know all of the group running that well so I desperately tried to get myself together which I did manage to do for a bit but Claire soon clocked I was not my usual self and the floodgates opened. Luckily, by this point I had slowed enough to be at the back of the pack so I could let off steam to Claire without making an idiot of myself in front of the others. Trying to work out why you are crying out on a run is tricky and all I can think is that I just felt a bit overwhelmed. I am so fortunate every week to run with amazing people who all have their own stories and experiences. We come together for an hour or so, run, chat and have a lovely time. There’s no judgement, no one gets cross if you’re slow and there is always, always encouragement. Here I was though suddenly feeling very self conscious about my running abilities and the future goals I have planned. WTF?! I know I am not going to smash the hour barrier on Saturday but I do know I will complete the Abersoch run and I will feel great afterwards. I also know that there will be nothing that stops me from giving the Eryri Marathon my absolute best shot. With that in mind, I got myself home, had a shower and entered the Deiniolen 10k advertised as “probably the hardest 10k you ever do”. Jayne says it’s a good indicator of the Eryri’s course profile so I might as well suss out what I have let myself in for!
I am going to hold Claire’s advice in my head and remember all the growth mindset stuff I try to instill in the kids I teach… I’m right, I can’t run the Eryri, yet! I just need to take it one training run at a time and go and enjoy this weekend’s race!